204: Five Unusual Things to Be Thankful for in 2021
Five Unusual Things to Be Thankful for in 2021
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Each year at Thanksgiving in the U.S., I do an episode on the five unusual things I am thankful for that year. These are things that might, on the surface, not seem like blessings – but have been. And I show parallels to how this, or something similar, might show up in your life.
Here is my list for 2021:
1. I am thankful for friends who weren’t.
This year, I completed relationships with a couple who I thought were two of my best friends. The reason for completing these relationships isn’t important, but here’s what I learned:
a. Not everyone is meant to stay in your life for the rest of your life.
b. Completing a relationship with close friends forces you to own your part in the relationship’s “failure” – and let the rest of it go.
c. In my particular situation, it forced me to focus on what I think of me – what other people think of me is none of my business.
d. Completing a relationship opens you up to room for new friendships. You can’t effectively navigate a lifetime of relationships if you only ever add people – never subtract.
Do any of these points resonate with you? Are there people in your life with whom it is time to complete the relationship? Are you owning more than your share of the breakdown of a relationship?
This is a saying I’ve often repeated:
“There are people who come into your life for a reason…a season…a lifetime.”
It’s so important to recognize which is which.
2. I am thankful for being in pain throughout my vacation.
For three years now, I have had a fair amount of medical issues around a fall I took at a local grocery store.
In September, I took a vacation to St. Lucia with my daughter and daughter-in-law. If you’ve never been there, St. Lucia is a volcanic island that is very hilly. Our villa was literally built into the side of a mountain.
I really struggled with all the stairs and steep inclines and declines. So the Monday after I got back from vacation, I switched up my diet, talked to my chiropractor and got a referral to a physical therapist I adore, and started with a new massage therapist.
It was good for me to come face-to-face with my physical limitations – it spurred me to become aggressive in doing something about it.
Maybe your limitation isn’t physical – do you struggle with a perceived mental or emotional limitation? Think you need more education or credentials to be successful?
Here are your options:
-Decide, today, to make some necessary changes that will move you in the right direction. Doesn’t have to be drastic; doesn’t have to be all the changes at once. Just start.
-Decide you are okay - really okay – with your limitation. It’s okay if you don’t have a bachelor’s degree or are 40 lbs overweight – it’s up to you to believe you are still worthy and fully capable – and you’re going to live your fullest life anyway. If you choose this option, NO COMPLAINING.
(By the way – it’s good to believe you are really okay AS you proceed to make changes in your life. It will help you get there more easily and even quicker.)
3. I am thankful for extreme discomfort in my personal life.
Throughout the year, in addition to my physical pain, I’ve experienced a lot of discomfort in my personal life.
I’m thrilled with where my business is, but the other areas of my life…not so much. So I’m working with a life coach and doing work on my own to create the life I want.
Here’s what I think has happened: I have had to evolve to a new version of myself in order to achieve the business success I’ve had. This new version of Lesa wants to also evolve the other areas of my life. I want to be as satisfied with my social life, how I spend my free time, and my living situation as I am with my career.
I love this dissatisfaction and what it teaches me. Here’s what it can teach you:
You are supposed to evolve throughout your life – and it will be extremely uncomfortable to do so.
-If you don’t evolve, you’ll be extremely uncomfortable as you resist the universe’s direction for your life. So – uncomfortable either way; pick your discomfort.
-Don’t let success in one area of your life overshadow the importance of the other areas of your life. They should all be evolving.
-Set goals in each of the areas of your life, along with specific strategies to reach those goals.
4. I am thankful for spending a lot of money on a coach.
Here’s why: I wouldn’t have evolved to where I am in my business without investing that money in a coach. I had to be serious and committed, I had to ask a lot of myself to get my money’s worth, and I had to learn to think differently.
Bonus: I’ve made a lifelong friend in my coach, who I adore beyond words. This was an unexpected, wonderful bonus.
Where are you unwilling to invest in yourself? What are you thinking that is causing you to be unwilling to invest in yourself? What do you need to think to become willing to invest in yourself?
It could be coaching, like me, or it could be a weight-loss program. Or a professional resume writer. Or learning ballroom dancing or how to play the piano. Learning a foreign language.
Here’s what I know: It’s almost never about the money. It’s about your thoughts. About your beliefs in yourself. About your beliefs in the investment. About your ability to get the results you want.
5. I am thankful for opportunities I said “no” to.
As my practice has become more successful, I’ve had to let go of some sub-contracting work and say no to some other opportunities that were presented to me.
Was it scary to, essentially, say “no” to money? Yes. What I focused on, however, was the opportunity cost of saying “yes.” Because, in each instance, these opportunities would take away from my ability to build my own business. Essentially trading in unlimited potential income for a semi-dependable $50 or $60 an hour.
Just as with friendships, saying “no” to some opportunities keeps you open for others that are a better fit for you. You are keeping space open for what you REALLY want, rather than filling space with what happens to come along.
As my daughter’s softball tee-shirt said: Good is the enemy of Great. Choose to wait for Great.
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